Free Association

 Its Thursday morning, October 21st, 2021, and I'm sitting in my ethics class doing a free association writing assignment. I guess I just want to reflect on how i'm feeling right now in the middle of a chaotic semester. I feel pretty stressed but i'm not gonna die. It feels as though due dates approach much sooner than they pass and I am frequently finding myself in a place of playing catch up, often due to my own lack of motivation and increased procrastination. But even so, I am grateful for my opportunity to be in grad school. I know that this experience is giving me more than just a degree that will allow me the knowledge and licensure to get my dream job, but also I am growing so much as a person. I know so many wonderful people that I would not have gotten the chance to become close to without being here. For that I am so appreciative. Grad school is allowing me mentorship and relationships with professors who I look up to so much, and even though at times I really don't want to do assignments, I am grateful for the knowledge and wisdom that they share. Every day is an opportunity to learn or to solidify and expand on knowledge that I have received. This is seriously a gift. I am grateful that I have a house to live in, even though I complain about it a lot. I am grateful that I have a roommate to come home to, even if I complain about her. I am grateful to have a car to drive, even when it breaks, or won't start. I am grateful to my parents for their unending and gracious support. Seriously they are my everything. Not only do they provide the tangible necessities like food, water, housing, but they are paying for my education completely. Through all of this support, they still support me emotionally without condition. There has never been a day where I had to question whether or not they believed in me, or had my back no matter what. They have always been so intentional about letting me know their perception of me and what I am doing, and it has always been such an encouragement. To know I have a safe space to try and fail, or try and succeed is the best gift to be given by your parents. It makes me feel as though I can shoot for the stars, because no matter where I end up, I have people who are there to celebrate, and that it a pretty dang good feeling. The same goes for my brothers, who are my two favorite men on the planet. I am so grateful for the two of them and all of the sacrifices they have made throughout our lives to encourage me from gymnastics and even now while i'm in school. I am so grateful that those two souls are a part of my family. I love them so much. My family keeps my world spinning, they keep me grounded, they keep me humble, and they keep me shooting for my dreams. 

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